Here's an interesting article about the current trend of men taking their wives name when they get married. At first I thought the guy must be a wimp to do something like that but then I started thinking about it and realized it's just a cultural norm for women to take their husband's name; it's just a tradition. And one that we could reverse anytime we want.
There are actually instances when it would be preferable for the husband to take his wife's name. If the wife is known professionally by her name, it makes sense for her to retain her it and for her husband take it as his own. And that would be preferable to the husband and the children having one name and the wife having a different name. I think having a shared name gives a family identity. We are the Smiths and this is what it means to be a Smith. You loose that family unity when everyone has a different name. Plus I'm sure it gets very confusing trying to keep on the names straight at the dentist, doctor, school, etc.
There really is no reason why the husband can't take the wife's name except for the ribbing that he would get from friends and co-workers and the pain it might cause his father. And of course the man card:
I kind of like the idea of the merged names, though a couple generations of merging names could result in some really unwieldy results: Smithjonesbakerhampton-Josephbarneysmithjones. I would never do this because the combination of our names does not have a ring to it (to say the least). I was actually happy to take my husband's name because it was better than mine (sorry, dad).Sam Van Hallgren, 32, co-host of the movie-review podcast Filmspotting, had to explain himself not just to his listeners but even to his co-host, Adam Kempenaar. Kempenaar was caught by surprise the first time Van Hallgren introduced himself at the top of their show with his new name. Van Hallgren was formerly Sam Hallgren until he wed Carrie Van Deest in August and they both took on the new, combined names.
Van Hallgren received a scathing note from a longtime listener with a subject line that read, "Sam, turn in your man card." The listener asked what "sissy juice" the host was drinking.
The Van Hallgrens, who live in Milwaukee, say they did it for their future children. The idea of merging names, which Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa also did when the former Antonio Villar wed the former Corina Raigosa in 1987, started out for Sam and Carrie as a joke. Then, while talking with a friend who was surprised Carrie would take Sam's name, Sam first uttered the merged version and they both liked it.
My husband said he would take my name if there wasn't such a social sigma attached to it. If you didn't seem like a wimp for doing it and wouldn't get so much grief from your co-workers and the loss of respect from your subordinates.
But I like gullchasedship's take on this and think that it's about right:
Yet there's a part of me that believes that a man who is willing to change his last name is showing respect for his wife and her past as well as a great deal of humility. It's definitely an example of leaving and cleaving.Though, he was worried about the man card too.
BTW, read the rest of the article and make sure you read the side column that has the naming conventions from other countries.
